Tim Sings a Song

And it's really not terrible. At all. Without further ado, here is Mr. Rice-Oxley singing Jackson Browne's "These Days" in a hotel room in Rio. Terribly depressing song.

On a Day Like Today

So some time ago, I found this absolutely magical performance of Keane's "On a Day Like Today", live in Amsterdam. It was released only on the UK version of Hopes and Fears, and when I found it on iTunes, I originally rather disliked it. But after seeing this live performance, and hearing Tom's earnest (and f-bomb-containing) explanation, I fell in love with the song.

And then YouTube informed me that the user had removed the video.

But not to fear! I found it again. So, from good ole 2005, "On a Day Like Today". It's not immediately the most interesting song, and Tom starts out a touch shaky, but it's an absolutely hypnotic, gut-wrenching, hopeless song. So the usual cheerful stuff. Oh, and for some reason, there are bubbles around 3:50. Seriously:

Anya Marina acousitc performance

Anya Marina is a strange cookie, but after seeing her live, I absolutely adore her. Oh, and she was the only one of the 3 performers who stayed for photos AND came over to our side of the bushes. That sounds bizarre. Anyway, this is an acoustic performance of "Vertigo".

Why We Need Strangers

These videos are short, blurry, and difficult to understand. Nevertheless, they absolutely prove why we need to own the documentary 'Strangers', pronto.

This is Tim's voice the whole way through. I did a Google Search and apparently this is somehow related to a Martin Short sketch/song. Notice Tom mouthing the words in the mirror in a disinterested manner:

EDIT: Apparently Ba-Ba-Ba-Broadway! is the title of a musical comedy Martin Short released 2 years after this documentary was made. So...maybe unrelated.



And you're sooooo smart, too. Definitely 11/10:



Just wow. In case you, er, can't tell, this is "Everybody's Changing":

Welcome Back. With A High Note.

I've said in the past...or at least, I've thought- that the world of classical music may have lost a possible star when Tom Chaplin decided to do that Keane rubbish. But watch this video. At the end, he sings the largest and most beautiful sundae...er...high note I have ever heard. HA! That phrase actually fits for once. Anyway, here's Keane recording 'Perfect Symmetry' (or rather, Symmotry) in Berlin last year:

Most Awkward Duet ever.

Tom Chaplin and Pete Doherty are kind of like a before/after picture. Every time the camera pans on Doherty here, I thank Neil Patrick Harris- because you KNOW this is somehow his doing- that Tom's over all his problems, because GOOD GOD he could be like this now. Case in point:

Poor Tom looks frightened and uncomfortable, as he well should; it can't be fun to stand a few feet away from a living reminder of a time Tom's referred to as "hell", "brainwashing", and a "cult"- namely, rehab.

Epic.

Only NPH could pull of a 2-minute commercial for, er, giving out free candy with such POW. Watch. It starts out corny, then....hahaha:

Minidoc Part 4

And finally, the conclusion of Tom's profound, disturbing, and silly L.A. documentaries, all from last December.

Why We Love 'Em

This is why everybody loves Jason Mraz.

LA minidoc part 3

The third part of Tom's L.A. minidocs, made way back in December. I always think he sounds eerily McCartney-esque on some songs, so it's actually quite unnerving how similar he can sound on purpose:

Comparison

Ok, so it isn't exact, but take Adam's performance a week and a half ago on Idol- I couldn't find a Youtube vid because Fremantle is being stupid, but you remember the eerie blue lighting, slightly evil sound, etc.?



THIS is what I thought of IMMEDIATELY, albeit without the freeze ray or evil death whinny:

Great Michael Interview

FINALLY, some promotion! Looooove the dancing.

Johns extra
by krunkyou

Busking

Tom really likes this busking thing, doesn't he? This time, it's in Buenos Aires. I love the confused people in the square.

Some Funny Keane Pics

By the way, none of these are photo-shopped.

Alright. I've grown to appreciate Jesse Quin, the unofficial 4th member, ever since that dying-cow noise he made in Tom's documentary. But you HAVE to admit there's something a little strange going on here.


I mean, I don't want to say he feels about Tom the way Tom feels about Bono, but...

Tim replies with a Dick Solomon face.


And I don't mean to be silly or anything, but...AHAHAHAHAHAHA LOOK AT TOM'S FACE!!!!! AHAHAHAHAHA.
He looks like he just watched Michael's elimination from Idol. Yeah, I went there.

I don't know what I love more about that picture: the crazy facial expression OR the fact that the web address contained the word "FLAB". I'm not kidding. I think somebody should be offended, but I'm not quite sure who.

Heeeeee.

I was trawling through Youtube in a mostly futile attempt to find clips from Mickey Blue Eyes for Layne when I came across this:



Yep, still as funny as it was then.

A Progression

Sorry, for those who don't appreciate Keane...wait. No. I'm NOT sorry. Anyway, here's a little progression I put together. I just think it's fascinating how they, particularly Tom, have gone from this in 2003, (shy, awkward, round-faced, floppy-haired, and rather off-key):



to full-fledged rock stars covering a Queen/Bowie song in 2007. Yes, they actually messed up a couple of times here, but it's a near-impossible song from every aspect, and Tom had real stage presence here, goddammit.



And, just because, a very sweet acoustic performance of 'Try Again' from 2007, complete with string quartet:

The Secret of the Shiny Hair

So this is what happens when a teleprompter malfunctions at the taping of Demetri Martin's show. Most comedians would wait backstage until the teleprompter gets fixed. But Demetri decides to entertain the audience by getting out his guitar and singing an impromptu song. (A capo, by the way, is a thin wooden thing you strap onto the neck of a guitar to block off strings, thus creating a higher chord.) He really is a strange, strange bird:

Important Things with Demetri Martin	Wed 10:30pm / 9:30c
Coolness - Behind the Scenes - Q&A Song
comedycentral.com
Joke of the Day Stand-Up Comedy Free Online Games

If I

This is a long special. Be warned. I hate how unreceptive the audience, too. But I think it's a fascinating look into the world of Demetri Martin, circa 2004.

Also, the pants. Do not be frightened. All will be explained, around Part 3, I think.

A teaser...

Soon I'm gonna post Demetri Martin's 6-part "If I" performance, which was inspiring and funny to say the least- it certainly made me feel less, er, special. Special in the weird way. Anyway, here's a little preview- it's Demetri's 224-word palindrome, entitled "Dammit I'm Mad". If you don't know what palindrome is, think perfect symmetry, in a non-Tom-Tim-Rich way. Or try to spot it:

Dammit I'm mad.
Evil is a deed as I live.
God, am I reviled? I rise, my bed on a sun, I melt.
To be not one man emanating is sad. I piss.
Alas, it is so late. Who stops to help?
Man, it is hot. I'm in it. I tell.
I am not a devil. I level "Mad Dog".
Ah, say burning is, as a deified gulp,
In my halo of a mired rum tin.
I erase many men. Oh, to be man, a sin.
Is evil in a clam? In a trap?
No. It is open. On it I was stuck.
Rats peed on hope. Elsewhere dips a web.
Be still if I fill its ebb.
Ew, a spider… eh?
We sleep. Oh no!
Deep, stark cuts saw it in one position.
Part animal, can I live? Sin is a name.
Both, one… my names are in it.
Murder? I'm a fool.
A hymn I plug, deified as a sign in ruby ash,
A Goddam level I lived at.
On mail let it in. I'm it.
Oh, sit in ample hot spots. Oh wet!
A loss it is alas (sip). I'd assign it a name.
Name not one bottle minus an ode by me:
"Sir, I deliver. I'm a dog"
Evil is a deed as I live.
Dammit I'm mad.


The best part, in my opinion, is something I'm very proud of myself for figuring out. You know what the point of symmetry is, the exact center of the palindrome? "I".

Union Chapel

Sorry, this is probably more interesting for the greater Keane aficionados amongst my readers.
I recommend watching in HQ, full-screen- very good quality. Just a few observations:
1) Tom HAS gained some of that weight back, hasn't he? Hm.
2) This is Union Chapel. Yep.
3) Tim's backing vocals have improved so much over the past few years, it's unbelievable.
4) They're singing Perfect Symmetry in a church. PERFECT SYMMETRY. The spineless dreamers hide in churches, and there is no heaven waiting for you song. In a CHURCH. Epic:

Some random bits and bobs

Just a few random tidbits- first of all, so Dunduk doesn't feel all alone in his non-understanding of NPH's epic NPH-ness, THE ORIGINAL PSYCHIC SPOONBENDER:



And another lovely little Keane song (with a moronic video. Sorry. The only other video I could find made some rather disturbing claims about Tom/Tim's relationship. PEOPLE. Jeez.) which I think ALL READERS of this blog will enjoy. This is another early, unreleased ditty entitled "He Used to Be a Lovely Boy", released as a B-side to "Is It Any Wonder" during their dark, uncommunicative, drug-fueled Under the Iron Sea period. It's quite obviously another Tim-to-Tom song, similar to "Hamburg Song", with lyrics like "no one here will miss you now":

Tom's Doc Part 2

Epic goofiness. EPIC.

Olivia Wilde on Ellen

Wow. She's actually quite funny. I'm coveting the suit, too.

Tom's L.A. Mini Doc, Part 1

Aha! Finally, an embeddable version has cropped up on Youtube. Yep, I get a little bit funneh when I'm jet-lagged too, but now I can take comfort in the fact that I don't imagine my blood disappearing down shower drains.

And the Irish/Scottish manager dude at the end is very, very bald- which is why Tom cuts in with the "Can I have some hair?" comment. Heee...

Coming soon: his What Do You Think Of? with Nicole Scherzinger of the Pussycat Dolls. You know, her. Hilariously, she's about as intellectual as she appears- yep- but Tom manages to be funny while completely respectful. And speaking in German. You'll see. Once I find it on Youtube, anyway.

Unreleased song!

Ha! I found a very old, unreleased Keane song. I mean, this is ANCIENT. But still quite sweet and very, very Beatles-y:

Michael on Idolatry!!!

Ah, finally. Yep, Michael Slezak has completely joined the Cult of Bruce. This is just a fun trailer-like thing for Michael upcoming Idolatry performance, which they preview. And as you might have guessed, the first lady is the you're-sooooooo-smaaaaaart lady. Yes, THE lady. You can kind of tell.

DAMN.

Well, I couldn't find the super-exciting thing I was looking for, but I found two less interesting videos to make up for it. Grrr.

Well, first we have Keane playing a tribute to Genesis at a VH1 concert. The low notes at the beginning were shaky and the song stinks, but it's...interesting. I got a very McCartney-ish vibe from Tom during the "nananana"s at the end. This was at the beginning of 2008, right when Keane had their quasi-reinvention...I think it was the debut of The Haircut and The Leather Jackets.

Also, I can't quite place that guy doing the introduction...hm. Seems a touch familiar, though.



And just for giggles: THIS is how I'm planning to make my performance at Sunday's recital stand out. Really, really stand out. BANG ON, MAN.

Funny Pictures

Just a few funny pictures today. Remember this epic Bono photo?
Well, THEY'RE EVERYWHERE!




My god. Terrifying. And this picture just made me laugh for a really, really long time...the dude's face...

Engrish!

Wow. This isn't even engrish. Nope, this is just a FAIL.

And this too!


This, on the other hand, is real, authentic engrish. All together now: "Just jiggle it a little." The best part is that the French says something like, "If you need to turn to the right until resistance", which is pretty engrish-y too.


Hee. Troublesome!

Bedshaped Music Video

Unfortunately Universal has disabled embedding for their videos, but ohmygoodnessgracious this is a fantastic music video:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XZFzC2lX7lw&feature=channel
Great song, too, from way back when (Hopes and Fears).

Engrish Time!

Yep, too lazy for captions today.

Early Winter; or, Gwen Stefani not-complete-FAIL

My god. Is it possible? Is it an actually...DECENT...Gwen Stefani song?

Well, of course, it's not a Gwen Stefani song. It's a Tim Rice-Oxley song, which means that all of the non-FAIL elements of this can probably be attributed to him alone. But still!



Of course, there's always room for improvement. Like, say, removing Gwen Stefani from the equation. (click here and watch in HQ- really worth it)



Ah, much better.

Fascinating Engrish

I have discovered my own inexhaustable source of engrish: the comments on the KeaneMusic blog.

For example, on a post about how some fan made these little wooden block-shaped models of Tim and Tom:

Greattttttttttttttt cute cute and where's Rich lol lol lol lol yeah !! maybe if hteses models make em dance lol lol lol lol Rich I love your arts LoVE ya my beloved band kisses fro Brazil we ara waiting for you in March :))))))))))))))))))))) ps: oh!!! thanks for the lovely video at UMusic me and all the fans here love when Tom said Belo Horizonteee lol lol lol lol

Where do you find this kind of amazing stuff ?... It's too funny because this looks like totemic artworks or to the trinket as we find in the "kings cake"... KEANE, too cute as small broad beans !!!

Hi ! Can anybody tell me if these headsquares of Tom and Tim mean they are stubborns? Answering km.com question.........Richard`s one , is on ebay and its price will make the drummer`s ego grow as the bear froth... (smirk). Great pictures, very funny. Cheers.

This sort of stuff makes my life very happy.

Thank You To Pseudo-Baldrick

This is just for giggles...

So, today I was reading Richard Hughes' (a.k.a. Keane's drummer, a.k.a Baldrick-in-disguise) photoblog and I spotted a photo that, for obvious reasons, reminded me of this video (rewatch from 3:40). The facial expression, the camera angle, the oblivious bloke in the foreground- perfect.



Just switch Tom with Dick and you get...

GNOMES!

Or, why Get Fuzzy has impeded my use of a loud ticking thing while practicing piano:

Even More Keane Goodies

Nothing earth-shattering, but quite pleasant. Also, EYEBROWS. Heeeeeeee.

First, I thought the title of this was right...but then I started to doubt myself...wouldn't the 3rd person plural of 'aller' be 'vont'? Or no? I'm not sure 'allant' is even a word...god, I am going to FAIL my French final.

EDIT: I was RIGHT! HA! There is no such word as 'allant' in the entire French language. BURN.

Er. Anyway:



And my personal favorite:

New favorite quote (read: you're going to hear a lot of this in the coming days):
"Nope...no magic emanating from over there..."
"Hey!"

What Do You Think Of?

Last summer, Tom Chaplin- the singer from Keane- decided to conduct 'interviews' of his bandmates, and here they are:

First, Richard Hughes, the drummer, shares his thoughts on war, Christmas, and Gordon Ramsay. I kept wondering exactly WHO he reminded me of...and then it hit me: BALDRICK. Just the way he talks and his intonations...you'll see.


Then, Tim Rice-Oxley, the keyboardist/mastermind, shared this thoughts on cows, religion, and hoodies. I'm still upset that he didn't answer the Hugh Laurie question. Oh well.

Band From TV!

Hugh Laurie and Jesse Spencer showing considerable musical skill. DAMN. And we didn't even have to watch too much of Jay Leno's Evil Chin of Death this time:

More Keane!

More goodiness, this time from a live gig in L.A. a couple of weeks ago. GUYS! WE HAVE LOUNGES HERE IN CHICAGO, TOO! REALLY! WE DO! PLEEEEEASE!

Anyway, Tim's playing a celeste. I suddenly feel verified:


You Don't See Me: Live at Largo LA from keaneofficial on Vimeo.

By the way, the dude from the 'Snowed Under' performance wasn't Argentinian. My bad. I mixed him up with another interviewer.

AND THEN A NARCOLEPTIC ARGENTINIAN FELL THROUGH THE CEILING!

Well, not quite. But it's Keane, performing a song they have NEVER RELEASED on an Argentinian talk show! And there's a very strange Argentinian man sitting behind Tom who attempts to sing along halfway through, causing some serious giggles from Richard Hughes, the drummer. Whose yellow Pumas I am COVETING right now.



For those of you who ACTUALLY DON'T UNDERSTAND where I'm coming from with the narcoleptic Argentinian thing...it's from Moulin Rouge. Jeez.

Busking!

AAAAH! Why can't we live in London? (Or, conversely, have Tom Chaplin live in Chicago...)

About a month ago, Tom Chaplin of Keane busked in Covent Garden to raise money for a charity, and my GOD! He sounded GORGEOUS!

Seriously, the dude sounds like that when singing outdoors in December, with just a cheap microphone and an acoustic guitar. Amazing.

First Engrish of the New Year

Or something.

Be NICE to it, dammmmmit!

Your House Bear Thang? Genius.

Especially if it's big, giant, or throbbing.

Complaint Letter

As some of y'all know, we have Blcokbuster Online at my house. Their service sort of, well, SUCKS. So I took the liberty of writing a nice little complaint letter to them:

Dear Blockbuster Online,
Once upon a time, long ago, I had a dog named Chubby. Chubby was a delightful, slim chocolate Lab who always fetched tennis balls and the like with no need for any sort of obedience training. However, due to the unthinkable emotional and psychosomatic strain brought on by his unfortunate moniker- which was actually short for "Chubermeister", my grandfather's name- Chubby developed an eating disorder and died. Right before he passed away, Chubby stopped fetching tennis balls, frisbees, and even those little rubber chew toys that smell like gasoline.

Your service is much like Chubby's fetching in those later years- gobsmackingly poor. Like Chubby, I hope you die a sad and painful death. Good DAY, sir.

*note: I didn't actually send this. Though I really, really wanted to.

The Worst Poem in the Worrrrrrld!

Sorry for going all Keith Olberman on y'all, but I found this genius poem on the website run by Kathryn and Ross Petras- the people who wrote The Lexicon of Stupidity, which has to be one of the most enjoyable books I've ever read. And I've read it at least 25 times. Anyway. They describe this as the worst poem in the world, and I can't really disagree...All of the 'plops' remind me of Microsoft Sam. Here is the masterpiece, written in 1850:

A TRAGEDY
by Theophile Marzials

Death!
Plop.
The barges down in the river flop.
Flop, plop.
Above, beneath.
From the slimy branches the grey drips drop,
As they scraggle black on the thin grey sky,
Where the black cloud rack-hackles drizzle and fly
To the oozy waters, that lounge and flop
On the black scrag piles, where the loose cords plop,
As the raw wind whines in the thin tree-top.
Plop, plop.
And scudding by
The boatmen call out hoy! and hey!
All is running water and sky,
And my head shrieks -- "Stop,"
And my heart shrieks -- "Die."


My thought is running out of my head;
My love is running out of my heart,
My soul runs after, and leaves me as dead,
For my life runs after to catch them -- and fled
They all are every one! -- and I stand, and start,
At the water that oozes up, plop and plop,
On the barges that flop
And dizzy me dead.
I might reel and drop.
Plop.
Dead.

And the shrill wind whines in the thin tree-top
Flop, plop.


A curse on him.
Ugh! yet I knew -- I knew --
If a woman is false can a friend be true?
It was only a lie from beginning to end --
My Devil -- My "Friend"
I had trusted the whole of my living to!
Ugh; and I knew!
Ugh!
So what do I care,
And my head is empty as air --
I can do,
I can dare,
(Plop, plop
The barges flop
Drip drop.)
I can dare! I can dare!
And let myself all run away with my head
And stop.
Drop.
Dead.
Plop, flop.

Plop.